Thursday, September 15, 2005
Confusion: the constant state of my mind.
Hmm... Due to changes in my schedule, I am now spending the rest of fourth period in the library ...mmH
It's starting to come down on me. All the homework I'm going to have all the time. The disappearance of my social life. the challenges to my intellect, the self-doubt, the insecurity, and the (that is hopefully all of the above will drive me to further) utter dependence on Jesus and his words.
I really would like to live on something other than the primal survival mode. I don't know if that is possible, but I crave significance. I always have. And I have it (meaning, significance, a purpose) in the Lord, but I lose sight of that so often.
Please tell me I'm not crazy and that you know what I mean. Even though I hardly know what I mean myself.
Perhaps I'm stressing out over nothing though... Maybe I should just remember that God is God (therefore I am not), that he loves me and has a plan for my life, and all I have to do is trust and obey his will.
Too much introspection clouds the simple.
It's starting to come down on me. All the homework I'm going to have all the time. The disappearance of my social life. the challenges to my intellect, the self-doubt, the insecurity, and the (that is hopefully all of the above will drive me to further) utter dependence on Jesus and his words.
I really would like to live on something other than the primal survival mode. I don't know if that is possible, but I crave significance. I always have. And I have it (meaning, significance, a purpose) in the Lord, but I lose sight of that so often.
Please tell me I'm not crazy and that you know what I mean. Even though I hardly know what I mean myself.
Perhaps I'm stressing out over nothing though... Maybe I should just remember that God is God (therefore I am not), that he loves me and has a plan for my life, and all I have to do is trust and obey his will.
Too much introspection clouds the simple.
