Friday, January 28, 2005
People who I know, but who don't know me.
For my first topical post, I will commence to write about People who(m) I know, but who (unfortunately) don't know Me. Remember to write topical comments if the need arises (and it should because I will send my attack monkeys to eat you if you don't) . This post will now divide into four main divisions.
A. People at school
(1) There are many people at school who I don't know, and consequently, they don't know me. There are some people who I know of, yet they don't know me.
(2) For instance, I know of a boy who is an exceptional saxophonist. I know his name. He does not know me. And this is not significantly affecting anybody. So I will move on.
B. People Outside of School
(1) I know personal details about several people who do not know me. They are musicians and celebrities. They would bore you, since you already know it all too.
(2) A girl named Sung Sang-Sing, her I know. She has no clue who I am, and no knowledge of my existance, or my expertise on her activities. She will be the topic of my Febuary topical post.
(3) Trees in the wintertime are bare. And whoever wrote "Christmas in the Northwest" should be condemned to live here. Or be hanged by her thumbs while her feet are tickled by lawn gnomes with evergreen boughs. Either one.
C. Zookeepers
(2) I know many zookeepers. Strange to say, they are all either kitchen appliances, monkeys, or dangerous pink robots (in which case I offer best luck to Yoshimi).
(1) They do not know me. They are too busy watching the monkeys eat PBB's. Once in a while a tiger escapes and they turn their full attention on it, which is good. Because escaping tigers only want attention. They are tired of everyone watching the monkeys, and they think its unfair for monkeys and flying squirrels to be the only ones to soar through the treetops.
(3) Am I the only one to have seen this desparate longing in a myriad of tigers' eyes? They do not know me, but I am determined to bring their cause to an unsuspecting public. I will be appearing on Oprah and Dr. Phil very soon to discuss this serious problem.
D. Jumping Beans with No Eyebrows (may or may not be Mexican)
(1) If all jumping beans are mexican
and all mexicans have no eyebrows
then all jumping beans have no eyebrows
(2) That, my friends, was a syllyiogism (Amy had better correct my spelling). And I can include the Mexican part because it is only my mother's German side of the family that gives me eyebrows.
(3) If brevity is the soul of wit
And this post is absurdly long and getting longer
then this post is wildly funny
It defies all logic!
E. True stories.
(1) "You don't know me, but I've known you a long time"
(2) The creepy words above were spoken by my mother to the clerk (the daughter of an old friend) at the old Ostroms a year ago.
(3) I died laughing.
(4) I am dead, and came back from my uneasy grave to write this. It's not so pretty under the daisies. My downfall, to everyone who is wondering, was caused by both my mother's dire words and the socialist monkeys, the triksy little beggars. ¡Viva la revalution!
A. People at school
(1) There are many people at school who I don't know, and consequently, they don't know me. There are some people who I know of, yet they don't know me.
(2) For instance, I know of a boy who is an exceptional saxophonist. I know his name. He does not know me. And this is not significantly affecting anybody. So I will move on.
B. People Outside of School
(1) I know personal details about several people who do not know me. They are musicians and celebrities. They would bore you, since you already know it all too.
(2) A girl named Sung Sang-Sing, her I know. She has no clue who I am, and no knowledge of my existance, or my expertise on her activities. She will be the topic of my Febuary topical post.
(3) Trees in the wintertime are bare. And whoever wrote "Christmas in the Northwest" should be condemned to live here. Or be hanged by her thumbs while her feet are tickled by lawn gnomes with evergreen boughs. Either one.
C. Zookeepers
(2) I know many zookeepers. Strange to say, they are all either kitchen appliances, monkeys, or dangerous pink robots (in which case I offer best luck to Yoshimi).
(1) They do not know me. They are too busy watching the monkeys eat PBB's. Once in a while a tiger escapes and they turn their full attention on it, which is good. Because escaping tigers only want attention. They are tired of everyone watching the monkeys, and they think its unfair for monkeys and flying squirrels to be the only ones to soar through the treetops.
(3) Am I the only one to have seen this desparate longing in a myriad of tigers' eyes? They do not know me, but I am determined to bring their cause to an unsuspecting public. I will be appearing on Oprah and Dr. Phil very soon to discuss this serious problem.
D. Jumping Beans with No Eyebrows (may or may not be Mexican)
(1) If all jumping beans are mexican
and all mexicans have no eyebrows
then all jumping beans have no eyebrows
(2) That, my friends, was a syllyiogism (Amy had better correct my spelling). And I can include the Mexican part because it is only my mother's German side of the family that gives me eyebrows.
(3) If brevity is the soul of wit
And this post is absurdly long and getting longer
then this post is wildly funny
It defies all logic!
E. True stories.
(1) "You don't know me, but I've known you a long time"
(2) The creepy words above were spoken by my mother to the clerk (the daughter of an old friend) at the old Ostroms a year ago.
(3) I died laughing.
(4) I am dead, and came back from my uneasy grave to write this. It's not so pretty under the daisies. My downfall, to everyone who is wondering, was caused by both my mother's dire words and the socialist monkeys, the triksy little beggars. ¡Viva la revalution!